So I've been told that I don't listen... why... because I think I know everything...which was true, until I began my transition of turning a new leaf.
And I quote, "As selfish as it sounds I'm just really focused and centered on myself right now. But you need to focus like that too..." Soooooo instead of doing what I usually did in the past of "ignoring" I'm going to listen, because she's right.
She's been through so much in the past 3 years, and I know I need to respect the fact of her needing space. Of her needing to focus and be centered on herself before she can focus on anyone else. As much as I love her and care for her I know there's a time and place for everything. Right now isn't the time for us to be focused on each other but on ourselves, because neither of us knows what the future holds. If I keep on focusing on her, and things don't go the way I have it planned in my mind where would that leave me... heartbroken... when that all could have been avoided. I guess it would hurt less this time around by doing what needs to be done then by what doesn't need to be done.
My feelings I'll still hold in a special place for when and if the time comes of us being together. But until then I'm just going to try and focus on Keena which won't be easy, but I have to make some kind of attempt.
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